It’s a question that I’m tossing around in my head, and I haven’t come to a clear conclusion.
My birthday is in two weeks. I love my birthday – always have. From what my parents tell me and from what I remember, I use to plan birthdays months in advance. What presents I wanted (and expected), what I wanted to do… And as much as I tread getting older, what can I say – I like to take advantage of celebrating a day that’s all about my existence.
But I digress… ;-)
The point of this post is actually not about my birthday, although it is what triggered the reason for me to write this post.
I’m dating someone older – 13 years, 4 months older to be more precise. What I can’t get over is how many people comment on the age difference. The age difference is almost taboo for some people. I don’t get it. Why does it matter? If two people are happy together and the relationship works, then why does it matter? I mean – there are instances that it’s obviously WRONG, but I’m saying – I’m happy, he’s happy… why is 13 so much bigger than 1, 5, or 10? Seriously?
Age makes a difference in our lives, but where do we draw the line? Age makes a difference in your mental and physical capacity. However, my 91 year old grandfather proves every waking day that he’s still sharp and witty. Age makes a difference in experiences and wisdom, but it’s not the same for every person. Some people have kids earlier in life, and some people have kids later in life.
In a relationship though, does it make a difference? Age makes a difference in the circumstances and experiences of the relationship. But, does that have to be a deal breaker? And why do people point it out as if it is?
When it comes to the actual relationship, age doesn’t have to make a difference. And for me, it doesn’t. I don’t even realize he’s older than me until someone points it out. Sometimes we joke about it … especially when I stare at him blankly when he makes a reference to a movie in the 80s that well… came out the year I was born.
I’m analytical. I want to draw a line, but it’s a bit tricky. I guess ultimately, it’s a personal thing. And I choose that here, age will not make a difference for me.
I'm with you, Hun. Age difference in a healthy adult relationship does not have to be a dealbreaker. I've been dating my older man for two years (as of next week) and he is my soulmate in every way--even with our 13 and a half year age difference. In fact, I think it's our age difference that makes us so compatible! I gain so much from his wisdom and patience (that comes with age) and he is ignited by my energy & spitfire ways (that is thanks to my "youth"). So! I'm truly thrilled that you've made the decision to set aside the spreadsheet, ignore the naysayers, and ENJOY your older man. He's sure lucky to have such a grounded, intelligent, beautiful (inside & out) youngin' like you! ;)
ReplyDeleteDamaris